New Reasons

"So here's what it is: at the risk of sounding needy, I'm asking you if you want to be friends with me."

Notes to Self are long-form journal entries posted in full. See Seven Yrs Ago for thread. I was 20 in late 2013.

               So here’s what it is: at the risk of sounding needy, I’m asking you if you want to be friends with me. I’m not asking about logistics like whether we have time right now or about whether your girlfriend or anyone would approve or not or anything like that. And really, I need an answer right now and be honest, like don’t pussyfoot around this.

               Because if you do wanna be friends, well then that’ll be awesome and I’ll know that whatever we do as people or from here/or college or whatever, when I see you, I’ll know that I can talk to you and not feel, like, shamed or unwanted or like I shouldn’t be there or like you feel sorry for me which I hate more than anything.

               And you know if you don’t want to be friends at all then I will officially give up and stop thinking about it and stop bothering you. Cause I totally don’t want to be in the way of things for you or anyone really. And really I obviously got all my other shit to deal with as well, so just one less thing to be unsure about would be nice.

               So, overly serious monologue done.

               Do you want to be friends?

For comments seven years later, go here.