“She said I must have been very good at coping. I said I must have been very good at acting.”
Notes to Self are longer journal entries from Seven Yrs Ago. Read Sticky, “must have been very good” for snipped poetry. I was 20 in late 2013.
Told my mother about the depression. I wanted to wait until after Christmas but certain things happened today that impelled me to burst.
I watched the movie “Four Christmases” with my dad, and the themes of the movie, repressing things, not talking about the real issues, not knowing about the other person, leaving things to boil between people and create boundaries etc.
She dealt with it pretty well. Gave some reasons about why the divorce happened which I tried to explain that wasn’t what I’m dwelling over. Just that it affected me in a lot of ways. Was surprised because she said she saw me just in my room or whatever doing the same things as before, like the divorce didn’t affect me. She said I must have been very good at coping. I said I must have been very good at acting. I told her how I still have feelings for Jason too. She told me I can find someone better than him. Just look good every day. I love my mom.
For commentary seven years later, go here.